| well this entry is completely the opposite tone of my last one...id like to think this song describes my feelings its called...
I Hate Myself For Losing You by Kelly Clarkson
Ohhh Ohhh
I woke up today
Woke up right awake
In an empty bed
Staring at an empty room
I have myself to blame
For the state I'm in today
And no dying doesn't seem so cruel
And oh I don't know what to say
And I don't know anyway
Anymore
I hate myself for loosing you
I'm seeing it all so clear
I hate myself for loosing you
What do you do
When you look in the mirror
and staring at you is why he's not here
You got what you deserved hope your happy now
Cause everytime I think of her with you
It's killin me Inside
And now I dread each day
Knowing that I can't be saved
From the loneliness
Of living without you
And oh I don't know what to do
Not sure that I'll pull through
I wish you'd know
I hate myself for loosing you
I'm seeing it all so clear
I hate myself for loosing you
What do you do
When you look in the mirror
and staring at you is why he's not here
Ohhhhh I hate myself for loosing you
And Oh I don't know what to do
Not sure that I'll pull through
I wish you knew
I wish you knew
And Oh
I don't know what to say
and I don't know anyway
Anymore
I hate myself for loosing you
I'm seeing it all so
I'm seeing it all so clear
I hate myself for loosing you
What do you do
When you look in the mirror
and staring at you is why he's not here
What do you say
When everything you said
Is the reason why he left you
In the end
How do you cry
When every tear you shed
Won't ever bring him back again
I hate myself for loving you
kinda like my love life im not gunna lie...
P.S. i found my prom dress...its gorgeous...too bad its a waste... |
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| hey guys! noone prolly reads these anymore because of myspace but oh well. so yeah im really happy right now because my favorite band is one of my friends...lOl. so i was supposed to go prom dress shopping but my friend couldnt go so im bummed. and im at home all by myself. how bad does that suck!!?? but anyways yeah...well ima go and find things to do so im not bored...oh yeah haha yesterday i walked home it yook 45 minutes lOl. i know thats pretty pathetic and i had to go potty the entire time! lOl
third strike |
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| - ((track)) cry...lOl hey guys long time no post...bot oh boy have i gone through some crap...alone.! i hate it when youre best friend isnt anymore because of another person...i really do because we were serious best friends and now were not and my place has been taken and she doesnt realize it but the person who took my place does and tries to fix it more than her...confusing i know...
so friday night/saturday morning 7 & 8 was horrible...if you know me ask and ill tell you...maybe.
it sucks because i still like you and you may still like me but youre trying not to...and i really want to be with you...oh well i guess im used to it.
i guess you could call it immune...only i can still feel my feelings so im not immune...i dont make sense when im ?broken hearted? you could call it i guess.
i wish i was like a double agent. that could be kinda fun...i could be someone im not.
well im very depressing so ill end...
third strike ((literally im outta there...)) |
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| Okay! man i have written in literally an eternity...(hang on let me take my pills)...okay no im not a druggie. okay maybe i am but not an illegal one anyways. last wedesday my foot ((that i had surgery on on december 1st) started bleeding at guard practice and through two band aids. so then i went to dr.parr (whos amazing let me just say) and he said he couldnt do anything about it and to come back in a month. so i called him on sunday because my foot swelled up really bad and was...well...frankly...gross. and so he basically operated on it in his office at around 8 in the morning. oh yes i had 4 or 5 numb shots but because of the infection once he was inside my foot they didnt work...painful?? oh yeah just a little. so he did all he could and couldnt find the pus ((gross word i know sorry)) and then instead gave me medicine and told me to take pain pills and to come back later in the week to see him again. so i went tuesday because it had swelled up more and he told me after rushing in from surgeries all day that i would have to have emergency surgery...im like okay...cool. NOT! i was freaking out but i had to have the surgery and then had to stay in the hospital unitl friday morning...i have staph...Katy Brock was right. so then friday night i went to the guard comp and they got second. then saturday night(tonight)...i went to my game and slipped coming in...yes on my foot and then had to get up...on my foot. it hury badly. then i was at my brothers party earlier tonight (still saturday night) and got up and didnt see the bags in front of me and fell again. im a klutz. K L U T Z! and i hurt. so thats why im a legal druggie. |
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| hey guys! so um ive gotten a myspace and its way cool so go check it out. go to www.myspace.com and go to search. search for email and type in jordans17@ev1.net and it should bring you to my page...well ill prolly update once in a while but for now im out....third strike
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